Free Coffee!

Geez. Listen, thinking positively goes a long way. And boy am I glad I was able to think positively today because it was a roller coaster of emotions, stress, excitement, and nerves.

My new favorite routine is going to the gym first thing. I no longer like to wait around until my grandmother is ready for water fitness, so I guess I have to make room in my budget for the 6 day a week 30 minute drive to the pool. That thought stressed me out and was lingering in my mind while I was picking up coffee from my Dunkin girls. I wasn’t discouraged, just in my head trying to figure it out. As always, the manager greeted me by name with my coffee and complimented my new suit. I pulled into a neighboring parking lot to drink my coffee like I do every morning now and started scrolling through the E2M page, like I do every morning. You see the pattern here, yes? I have become quite the creature of habit, in autopilot from the moment I wake up until after I leave the gym.

This morning experienced a small stutter that just made my whole day brighter. One of the ladies who is usually there in the mornings didn’t see me come through the drive through, so she thought I was running late but got my coffee ready for me anyway. 15 minutes of scrolling through Facebook, I hear “Jamie! Miss Jaaaaamiiieee!” It’s still pitch dark outside, and I nearly jumped out of my skin. I turn and see this girl running across Dunkin’s parking lot towards me with a coffee in hand. I’m sure the look on my face was something like walking into a surprise party but she jogs up to my window and hands me the coffee. “I didn’t see you come through this morning, but I made you a coffee ahead of time and just noticed you sitting over here, so here ya go! A free one!” I’m sure the sun nearly rose by how big I smiled. I thanked her several times and sat there grinning for several minutes.

I felt so good driving to the gym until… I got there and went to get my headphones out of my bag and my husband had jacked them! THE HORROR! There isn’t even any gym music in the area where to pool is. Knowing I was about to spend two hours alone with nothing but the humming of a fan made me so irritated. He wasn’t awake but I sent my husband a barrage of less-than-friendly texts. Good thing that girl had made my morning or I might have driven home and slapped him. It’s ok though, my daughter apparently slapped him awake so she got the vibes I was sending. The workout felt so much harder without my music, but I got through it and swam until 8 when my friend got there, then we chatted until 8:30 when class started. Got that in and headed home, steeling my nerves for what was to come.

Seeeee, I kind of have been wanting to cut my hair super short but I kept putting it off. Last night, I decided to cut my pony tail off so I would be forced to go to the salon. And thanks to Kimberly, I finally got up the courage to cut it all off. I don’t think anyone has ever sit so still but been so jumpy as I was in that chair as I watched the buzzers sheer my hair off and knew there was no turning back. An hour later, it was done. It’s a major change, but I’m adjusting to it. I’ll reveal it on Friday when I take my final pictures for the transformation shoot.

The best thing about that appointment, since my stylist was not a talker and it was a rather quiet experience, was her telling me to put my head down. No one has ever had to tell me to put my head down. My self-esteem has been so low for so long that having my head down was my natural form. I giggled a little when she said that because I’m amazed at myself for how high and straight I hold my head now. I have a lot of pride and confidence now and it shows in my posture. The other interesting moment was finding out I apparently have very muscular feet. I didn’t even know feet could be muscular. I got a good laugh out of that.

A few errands on the way home, then had a virtual doctor visit that nearly made me rip my hair ou.. wait. I don’t know what expression to use now. But between my daughter not listening and my dog show-jumping the gate and onto my stomach mid-sentence, it was a stressful call. It’s been a nice, relaxing afternoon since. Well, until I reach up to touch my head and remember I have no hair. Then I panic a bit again, ha! But seriously, a positive attitude made all the difference in managing my stress today. And I’m so grateful for that lovely girl for adding to my positive attitude this morning. Do kind things for people, you never know what they may be feeling, and you could make an incredible difference.

For the remainder of the week, I’ll be posting comparison pictures of different stages of my journey. To encourage others, to keep myself accountable, and to prepare for the end reveal. I hope you’re off to a great start to your week and if not, it’s never too late to get it done.