Just Move

5 months ago, I could never have imagined finding somewhere I felt at home other than in my own home with my little family and pets. If anyone had said “6 months from now, you’ll be 25% smaller, a vocal member of a new tribe of over 100k people, and yearning for all the time in the gym you can get,” I would have kicked their shins for mocking me. Nothing can change that quickly, can it? Yes. It absolutely can, if the change happens from the inside out.

My life changed almost overnight because of E2M. One day, my aunt sent me a message about a program she was doing because I was so frustrated and tired of trying to manage my diabetes. I was eating better, not great, but I was still having such a hard time keeping my levels down. I would eat a salad and my glucose still be over 200 two hours later, even on 46 units a day of insulin. I was so tired and discouraged. I read about the program, asked a couple of questions, and decided that even if it was a Hail Mary, I would just go for it. I joined just a couple days later, made way into the group and made the decision to post my first pictures. Pictures where I felt terrible about myself, didn’t even see a human being in myself, and was overwhelmed by shame. But I mustered the courage and threw myself at this group of people I knew nothing about. Overnight, that all changed. After that post, the love and support changed me. I saw myself differently. I saw my challenges differently. I saw my pain differently. I changed.

Nearly 5 months since I started, I’ve lost a whole 1/4th of who I was, but I am 1000 times better than I was. The biggest key in that success, the missing piece that I needed to really help get control of my physical and mental health, was -moving.- I didn’t move at all for years. Just to the bathroom and back, or to the car and back when I had to go out. Everything was delivered, I had others shop for me, and I couldn’t even stand up to shower. My first day on E2M, I decided to move again. I made it about 100’ before my back collapsed. But I kept moving. A couple of weeks later, I started going to the pool so I could exercise. Soon, I was able to shower properly. Then I could walk more. Then I could exercise more. And now I can do nearly everything for myself after soooo many years of relying on others to do it for me.

Movement. Forward motion. Spent energy. Exertion. This was my medicine. My diabetes became manageable and I have decreased all meds (hoping to be rid of them completely in the next couple of rounds), my mental health improved dramatically, and I became independent. I have a long, long way to go; but I don’t doubt myself. I -will- be the strongest and healthiest version of me, no matter how long the journey, because I have come to love the journey.

The gym pool is more a home to me than my own home these days. I’m relaxed, I’m joyful, I’m in my special place. I am anxious to get there, and hate to leave, every time. My body and soul are blessed every day by it. I would never have believed that could be me.

What I hope you takeaway from my word blurb today is this: just get moving. If you can’t do the circuits, modify. If you can’t stand, do them seated. If you can’t do them seated, just move however you can. Just move. Your body, and your mind, will thank you.

Workout done, first meal down, working on that water. Amanda happened to be in the locker room today when I got there so she’s guest starring in my workout photo!