Meeting Wanda!

-
My 5th unique sickness in 8 weeks. Whatever Bryn has (not Covid, strep or flu, thankfully) took up residence in my head yesterday. I felt ok when we went to the beach but then I started getting very fatigued. By noon, I was dragging and felt feverish. Laid down at 2, woke up at 3:30 with my neck swollen from lymph nodes and a 100.5 fever. I cancelled all the meetups and decided to head home. Wanda Laduzinski decided it was worth the risk to her so we met up in a parking lot to talk a but before I headed home. I didn’t want to share the picture because of how swollen I look but I’m proud to have met this lady and that’s worth showing off! 

I’ve been mostly asleep or zoned out since getting back. I’m beyond frustrated with these back to back sicknesses, but I’m also counting my blessings that we were able to get through our Disney days before it set in. Our trip was blessed, in that way and in 10 days without rain in Florida. I also didn’t gain any weight while there so that’s even more amazing. I had hoped to be back in the gym tomorrow but now I’ll have to wait out this new illness. Just going to keep chugging my water and doing my best until then.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Impromptu Rest Day

-
Image
Impromptu rest day today. I woke up too early, with a headache. I got on my recumbent for 10 minutes then switched over to the rowing machine, but only got about 4 minutes in before the headache got too strong to continue exerting. I was hoping some coffee and water would break my headache, but alas, it’s been 12 hours and it’s still here. I rarely got headaches before I had the epidural injection back in July, but now I have them often, some days much worse than others. I still find a reason to smile though, every day! I put on my self-rep shirt for coffee today. Some memories popped up on my widget screen and I couldn’t help but be astounded by the changes in my face, not just the size, but the proportions have changed so much. Even my nose, it’s crazy. I don’t even know what I’m going to look like when I get to a healthy weight because I’ve been morbidly obese since 4th grade. You’re all on this adventure with me, and I have no idea where we are going, but I’m loving the journey. Th...
Read more

The Most Monday of Mondays

-
Image
Last night, my mindset slipped. Any of you who know what PMDD is knows it can be a psychological nightmare. I have been hospitalized because of it before, so it’s a major issue for me, mentally and emotionally. I managed to fall asleep before it caused any serious problems, but the seed of doubt was planted. This morning, I woke up feeling very down. I messaged Anna and told her I needed encouragement today. I explained how I was feeling—that my success wasn’t real, my eyes were deceiving me, that I measured wrong, that I was even bigger now than I had been before. I felt like a whale. When I looked at my pictures, and looked in the mirror, I felt like I looked bigger than I did when this started. It was a scarily realistic deception my brain was playing on me this morning. Anna gave me words of encouragement, but they didn’t stick at first. I had a doctor’s appointment this morning so, my routine being thrown off wasn’t helpful either. My nurse and doctor even complimented my appeara...
Read more

Health Anxiety

-
Image
I didn’t get home until midnight last night, fell into bed and cried myself to sleep. Shame and fear. I don’t think I’ve ever talked about this in a group post, and it’s really vulnerable for me to open up about like this, but I suffer from severe health anxiety. If you have it, you know well what that means. For those unfamiliar, it’s basically like living with the constant worry that every little pain or illness that happens to you is because you’re dying. Random pain in your arm, it’s a heart attack. Bump on your skin, it’s cancer. Lymph nodes swollen, it’s lymphoma. Like…it’s exhausting. I had health anxiety as a child because I went through several scares with my health around puberty, that’s a loooong story. After my mom passed and I stopped caring about life, it improved. But then after having my daughter and the pandemic, it became worse than ever. My anxiety has been heightened ever since my mysterious chest pain started a couple of months ago, but I handled it well. Until I g...
Read more